Do what others won’t, say what others won’t, reveal the magic that’s inside of you that others hide away and shine bright!!!
These were the encouraging words my good friend wrote to me today.
When I read them it brought me to tears. It is strange how words can have an effect on you like that huh? It reminded me how much of my life I’ve spent in hiding, and still want to sometimes. It is what happens when you experience violent trauma at an early age, or at any age for that matter. I decided to bury myself deep inside. It was too dangerous to shine. I got very busy working out what people wanted from me and presenting that to them in order to stay safe and maybe get some affection.
I wanted to shine. I remember how good it felt. I found ways to shine inside some of the characters I played. I was very good at playing them, so good I even believed them myself and completely lost touch with my natural free shining. Like being the best little Catholic girl, sacrificing myself for others because that is what I understood good Catholics should do. It hurt when they didn’t do the same. I learned about the importance of turning the other cheek … which led to having my head beaten to a pulp on the concrete pavement on my way to church one Sunday.
The trouble with basing your behavior on what you think people want is that you don’t set any boundaries for yourself. This led to violent rape at the age of 14 and to marrying a man who attempted to murder me … on several occasions until I gathered the courage one day to run away.
The Pain of Being Invisible
It just confirmed to me how dangerous a place the world is and so I spent all of my energy keeping my magnificence hidden away. This had two results. One is that because I was using up so much energy to survive there was hardly any left to thrive. It took its toll on my body, pain, chronic fatigue, cancer. At the same time I felt alone, unsupported unfulfilled and empty. I was so out of touch with myself I thought I could analyse it all away.
When that didn’t work and my body had reached the height of its exhaustion and pain I finally took the decision to look inside to see what I could find.
A Glimmer of Hope Opens the Way
I was looking for a glimmer of hope. It was the first faint remembering of my inner light.
It is amazing how a small opening like that can lead to such a vast infinite immersion into the ocean of magnificence I experienced and remembered myself to be. Everything changed after that. I was reconnected with my true shining. All of the trauma and pain that I had experienced before faded into the vastness of Being. I was grateful for the contrast that had led me to appreciate the light of joy in me that had unleashed in such a miraculous and brilliant way, never to be covered again.
Yes, sometimes there is an impulse in me to hide in certain situations. That reptilian brain just wants to protect me and is supporting me the best way it knows how. My magnificent self says, “Thank you reptilian brain, I can handle it from here!”
By Joy Idries
Expert facilitator of deep and transformational life changes
(There is MORE TO LIFE than struggle fear and pain)
What if it were possible to discover true consistent freedom happiness and joy by connecting with your true nature in a way that, frankly, blows your mind? Joy’s spiritual therapeutic work is life-changing. It completely dissolves inner turmoil and opens her clients to the real possibility of living a truly happy, fulfilled life.
As recounted in her book “Joy Unleashed” Joy shares her own journey of healing a lifetime of trauma chronic illness and pain in ONE WEEKEND! It unleashed so much joy and freedom it fired a passion in her to show how everyone else can do the same. Now as an Inner Journey practitioner, intuitive, spiritual teacher and guide for many years it has been her sheer delight to show people how they can easily and rapidly heal and unleash their true joy and well-being, often where conventional methods seem to fail.
Apply for a free consultation here: https://trulytransformational.co.uk/apply/